Hobroken in peril but not to worry, the Nazi truck will Move Forward to safe ground
Many of you are worried about me with the coming hurricane but I can assure you where I’m currently situated which may be in Italy or in a conference room with lawyers discussing existing or future lawsuits against citizen websites and residents telling the truth about me, I am both warm and dry.
My devout husband Wickedly and I have taken steps to ensure our safety since that terrible act of God some years back where the guy upstairs we’re not on good terms with sent a lightning bolt striking our home. So you need not worry about us and I trust this will give you comfort as we’ve contracted with the other guy downstairs below Wickedly’s wine cellar. Go Team Beelzebub and let’s Move Forward!
Our preparations to destroy Hobroken has been stymied by this horrid mayor who insisted on blocking a planned bankruptcy and saving 1,000 jobs with that dumb hospital we don’t even need, but this hurricane will not finish the job I was elected by those of you in service to evil to do. This I promise you from the bottom of my shrunken black heart. Yes, there’s a small bit of dead flesh left there but like those council members in my way, I’m diligently working to excise all of them once and for all. You could be next and Wickely is reviewing my lawsuit allowance as we speak.
I’m proud to announce after another set of successful negotiations for page three ads with the Hudson Distorter, I will be continuing to provide the Muve Farward campaign additional thousands in support with my political operatives, in-kind hammer and nails, and of course all the top-flite professional services that go into making the best short videos depicting me and the souls I own on behalf of the netherworld as victims. I’d like to give a special shout out to Sperry Klauzen who continues to show his love for me above all. Congratulations to both you and Oskey for licking my crap trodden boot clean.
These are all very successful developments for the city and I know many of you can’t wait until the Nazi truck returns for a fifth showing next week. The feedback from all of you has been tremendous. My cameraman Jim has provided great footage for our next video where we will be taking on the mayor and Gov. Christie who continues to hold that job without my expressed authorization.
Some will say Gov. Christie was elected by the citizens but I did not approve of that law installing him nor sanctify with evil those laws keeping me from wielding absolute power over all of you here and beyond. I will continue my brave fight in the face of these laws posed against me and my absolute power.
Stay tuned as my political operatives will be providing important anonymous babbling to Sal Gullible at the Hudson Distorter how a media savvy person like me will not be making any statements on the FBI investigation of emails I don’t know how arrived on my home computer. Unless there’s proof I personally emailed the stolen data from the mayor’s office to myself, I’m going to say I’m innocent.
If that guy Saul in Newark has any brains, he’ll stay away from me. If he doesn’t I’ll sue him too.
|This is an emergency communication of the Bet Mazin Nazi swastika truck team. Had this been our actual Nazi truck flying in the air during a hurricane, you would be given notice of where it’s flying and how to avoid being hit with either the vehicle or one of my lawsuits. Disclaimer: N/A to any of you Zimmerists or worshippers of the guy due north above our heads. I’ll sue you all?|
P.S. We are suspending BoE campaign operations as we move the Nazi swastika truck to higher ground. A new video production team is however continuing with our newest episode. Once the Nazi truck’s safety is confirmed the production team will load my approved video and Jose Blanco will confirm the rental with movie showings all around town.
The Hudson Distorter will keep you informed along with that dead carcass at Hobroken411.
Please don’t see this link:
Weather graphic courtesy of Grafix Avenger